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| Lost in Forever |
05.24.05. Schools out and i'm fucking bored. Long time no update so why not. Suprise me and tell me someone actually
reads this bullshit. Still kinda stuck on the same asshole. It still sucks. Lets party. Lets get drunk. Lets erase all this
stupid bullshit. I'm out.
12.15.04 When you cant decide, what do you do? My mind is a fucked up bundle at the moment. I dont know what to do. Sad
thing is that nobody except me had any idea what i'm talking about. Put it this way, i wrote a letter and now i think i've
lost something. I don't know if i know how to deal with losing that. I really dont know, just let it play out i guess is what
i have to do. I still want the tree deal though. Confuzed yet? Yeah, I thought so.
11.11.04. WOW! No not really just aiming for attention. I'm an idiot, i'll admit that much. Cody and
I broke up. Not to big of a loss there.....a few days after he asked brit to hang out so FUCK HIM! Plus he already has a date
to chisolms winter ball. Wow, whoop-de-fucking-do! Ummmm whats new, whats new. I decided to dye my hair black. Yeah that was
fun. I like it anyways. I dont really give a fuck what others think about it lol. Oh i'm starting to gauge my ears. Don't
know for sure how big exactly but i'm thinking an eight or a six. Not sure. We just got a new puppy today, pics later. But
hes really cute and we named him Koda. He's supa fly! lol! Still on my drought.....thats another thing about Cody, he was
prude as hell. Almost 8 for me. Wow, amazing. But anywhos, i guess we'll just have to wait and see what this weekend
brings us. Bonfire at Chris's Saturday night after work! HELLS YEAH!
10.17.04 Is it wierd to think that i'm happy again. Truely happy. I have a boyfriend who actually likes
me for who I am. Not someone whos gonna hit it and quit it like the last asshole. Oh well, its not like Justin knows
he got played back or anything. But its really nice to know that someone really cares soo much about who you are and, dare I
say it, loves you? I'll keep it at "potential" to happen. It has a lot of potential in my opinion. Only thing that kinda worries
me is slut numbers. My first number is 19 and his is 7. I'm worried that hes not gonna think to highly of 4 being my last
number. I'm kinda scared to let him know cuz i'm pretty sure his isnt near that. Hmm.....maybe i'll bring it up tonight....
10.7.04 S-l-o-w is the only word to describe this week. Alot has happened since I last wrote.
For one, met a totally awesome guy. Dating him now and couldnt be happier with things. Cody is a soccer player at enid high
and works at jumbos so hes not a total loser unlike the last guy i was talking to. BTW #26 wants her stuff back. Moving on
now..... Still working, still going to school. One big thing that happened is with Ryan. His dad completed suicide Sunday
October 3. Its all still very shocking to everyone. I feel so bad for Ryan. He definatly is not the kind of person who deserves
this. Hes strong though and I have faith that he'll make it through this ok. Onto this weekend.....Partying tomorrow
night with shasta and then working the rest of the weekend and spending time with Cody. Sounds like fun to me!
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